When faced with life challenges, many of us default to “fixing” the difficulties because we assume that they are “broken,” rather than just are inevitable parts of life. Fixing may be an attempt to control every possible outcome in hopes of avoiding discomfort. While this may feel productive, it often fuels anxiety and distances us from the present moment. In contrast, the philosophy of “Creating vs. Fixing” encourages us to shift our focus to proactive, intentional actions that promote well-being in the now. Drawing on mindfulness, cognitive-behavioral practices, and existential psychology, this approach teaches us to live fully in the present while navigating life’s challenges. Let’s explore this transformative mindset through the lens of a therapy session between Cathy and I, a patient preparing for childbirth.
Cathy: I’d like to get some help with my pending childbirth and the fears I have about it. That’s at the top of my mind right now. I’ve mentioned to you before that childbirth has always been something I feared most of my life. And now, any day now, it’s happening. I’m already emotional about it. I’ve been trying not to dwell on it or think too much about it because it genuinely frightens me. I just want to ease that fear because it’s going to happen. If I go into it feeling afraid, I think it will make the experience worse. I want to own as much of the experience as possible because I believe it can be beautiful. But there are so many decisions and unknowns—it’s overwhelming.
Cathy proceeded with how she had been planning about her childbirth.
Dr. Ferrer: You seem to be overanalyzing your childbirth preparation—whether to drink the tea, do yoga stretches, eat the dates or even to determine how much epidural injections should you get. But all those are still making you anxious because you want a guarantee that they will make the process easier and also eliminate the fear you are experiencing recently. What if we shifted the focus from ensuring future success to asking, “What can I create right now that benefits me?”
Cathy: I feel stuck. I keep thinking, if I do all these things and they don’t make childbirth easier, what’s the point of even doing them? It feels like I’m setting myself up for disappointment even more.
Dr. Ferrer: That’s the mindset of “fixing”—doing something now purely to control a future outcome. Instead, let’s ask, “Does this action improve how I feel or function in this moment?” If drinking tea or stretching is better than worrying, then it’s worthwhile, regardless of what happens later.
Understanding the Problem: Fixing the Uncontrollable
The tendency to “fix” is natural. Fixing involves trying to solve or prevent future problems through meticulous analysis and planning. While this approach can be effective for practical tasks, it becomes problematic when applied to situations outside our control. Cathy’s fixation on childbirth preparation, for instance, stems from a desire to control an inherently unpredictable process. This overanalysis not only increases her anxiety but also consumes mental energy that could be used to enhance her current well-being.
The issue with fixing lies in its transactional nature—it’s tied to a specific desired outcome. If the outcome doesn’t align with expectations, the effort feels wasted. This mindset often leads to a cycle of disappointment, self-doubt, and paralysis.
The Alternative: Creating in the Present
In contrast, the argument of “creating” focuses on intentional actions that enhance the present moment, independent of future outcomes. By shifting her focus from controlling childbirth to engaging in meaningful activities, Cathy can redirect her energy toward actions that bring immediate value. Whether it’s deep cleaning her coffee maker, practicing gratitude meditation, or savoring her morning coffee, these acts of creation foster a sense of accomplishment and presence.
Creating isn’t just about productivity; it’s about cultivating a mindset of mindfulness and generativity. For Cathy, stretching or walking doesn’t have to guarantee an easier labor—it’s enough that these activities help her feel grounded and healthy now.
Why Creating Works: A Theoretical Perspective
- Mindfulness Theory (Kabat-Zinn, 1990): Creating aligns with mindfulness by anchoring individuals in the present. Mindful actions like gratitude meditations or sensory awareness reduce mental clutter and help individuals step out of anxiety cycles.
- Flow Theory (Csikszentmihalyi, 1990): By engaging in meaningful tasks, individuals enter a “flow state,” characterized by deep focus and enjoyment. Cleaning, walking, or stretching can be flow-inducing, helping Cathy feel accomplished and calm.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (Beck, 1976): Fixing often reflects cognitive distortions like catastrophizing or fortune telling. Creating, on the other hand, aligns with CBT principles by emphasizing actionable, positive behaviors that counter negative thought spirals.
- Existential Psychology (Frankl, 1946): Creating connects to the existential idea that meaning arises from proactive engagement with life’s challenges. By focusing on what she can create, Cathy finds purpose in the journey, not just the outcome.
Practical Steps to Shift from Fixing to Creating
To adopt the mindset of creating, consider these practical steps:
- Ask, “What can I do now?” Instead of worrying about outcomes, focus on actions that enhance your present.
- Engage your senses. Activities like smelling coffee beans or feeling the texture of your sheets can ground you in the moment.
- Practice gratitude. Start your day by identifying things you’re thankful for, then immerse yourself in those thoughts.
- Create daily intentions. Set achievable, well-being-promoting goals for the day, such as taking a walk or meditating.
A Transformative Perspective
By embracing the philosophy of “Creating vs. Fixing,” Cathy—and anyone grappling with uncertainty—may hopefully reduce anxiety, increase self-efficacy, and find joy in the process of living. This principle doesn’t negate the value of preparation but reframes it as a means to cultivate presence and intention. Life is unpredictable, but our ability to create meaning in the moment is always within our control.
Read more from Rizaldy R. Ferrer, Ph.D.
References:
Beck, A. T. (1976). Cognitive therapy and the emotional disorders. International Universities Press.
Csikszentmihalyi, M. (1990). Flow: The psychology of optimal experience. Harper & Row.
Frankl, V. E. (1984). Man’s search for meaning (Rev. ed.). Washington Square Press. (Original work published 1946)
Kabat-Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain, and illness. Delacorte Press.
Disclaimer: The information provided in this newsletter is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice. If you are experiencing any mental health issues, please seek professional help. The author of this blog is not liable for any damages or injuries that may result from the use of the information provided here.
When applicable, the names, gender identification, location and/or other identifiable characteristics have been modified to maintain privacy and confidentiality; whilst, still maintaining the integrity of their stories and narratives.
